Sitting here still on this starting line
Thinking 'bout how I, had the best old stories
Junior's sitting here bored and I'm
Pretty sure that I've, told him my best old stories
How the hell did it come to this?
How did I become this, tired sad and lumpy?
Used to get princesses now I'm getting fat
And I'm getting lapped, by an actual monkey
All those days, when it was all ok
And my villain game
Was the best in town, now all I do is think about
Olden days, when it was all ok
Then that plumber came
And it all came down, now all I do is think about
I'm just spinning round, trying to figure out
Things keep giving me lots to think about (x2)
How I struck fear into people's hearts
With my piranha plants, that did my bidding for me
Now I can't fit in this tiny car
And people start to laugh, when they first saw me
I can't stand it, I'm a king goddammit
Tryna cram my flab into a child's go-kart
Where's my castle? I can't drive this fast e-
nough to pass my past cos life is moving so fast
All those days, when it was all ok
And my evil brain
Was the best in town, now all I do is think about
Olden days, when the Thwomps got outta my way
They all knew my name, then it all came down
Now all I do is think about
I, was king of the Koopas
Now I'm just a loser, in Ghost Valley 1, thinking "oh, what kind of a father
Slips on a banana, in front of his son?"
Now I'm just spinning round
Trying to figure out
Things keep giving me lots to think about
All those days, when it was all ok
And my evil brain
Was the best in town, now all I do is think about
Olden days, when the Thwomps got outta my way
They all knew my name, then it all came down
Now all I do is figure out
Ways to save my dignity when crashing out
I won't feel a thing cos I'll be thinking bout
Olden days
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